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Ava Cadell, certified sex counselor and author of NeuroLoveology , told me. But a lot of women want to go straight to vibrators -- perhaps the infamous "rabbit" episode of "Sex and the City" piqued their interest? Some work best with clitoral stimulation and others need full penetration to get anywhere at all. In fact, shopping together makes for a great "date," said Cadell. Don't I satisfy you? You can say things like, "I feel like sex toys will add more variety to our sex life" or "I'd like to experiment with a vibrator or a dildo. Each person's insecurities and fears about sex toys are unique. Want to test the waters? Next, think about how strong you want your vibrations. Obviously, there's quite a bit to sift through, so here's what you need to know: Start with massage candles. Once you've decided you're willing to give sex toys a go, let your turn-ons guide you on where to start. Make self-love a priority and never let anyone make you feel ashamed of looking out for yourself in the bedroom. While at Babeland, I saw everything from sleek, colorful vibrators in reimagined phallic shapes to vibrators disguised as makeup to state of the art vibrating eggs -- the Revel Body actually uses the same sonic-wave motors as Sonicare toothbrushes. This means both mental exploration and physical exploration. Into the 50 Shades craze? Cavanah said that if it takes "a good while" for you to get off with your hand or you need a shower massager, go for more powerful vibrators. If you're curious about sex toys, you need to get over your insecurities and fears. Before I knew it, I found myself in a bright pink sex shop surrounded by vibrators, cock rings and all sorts of sexual contraptions I'd never want my mother to know I've seen, all in the name of research. Try a blindfold or a ben wa ball if you're adventurous. Figuring out what you like in the bedroom is the best piece of advice for great sex. And it's safer than a one-night stand," Cadell said. What do you think? Make peace with who and what you are and great sex will follow, assuming you also follow the next piece of advice. They're just yummy enhancements. A sex toy can't cuddle; a sex toy can't kiss; it can't give you compliments,'" Cadell said. After helping countless Babeland shoppers over the store's year run, Cavanah suggested to think about what turns you on and go from there.
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